Stop Expecting Free Stuff From Your Friend’s New Business
Don’t ask about their “friend-rate” either
We have all been the proud supporter of our friend or family member who is creating something new- be it a business, service, or product. They have quit their mind-numbing day job and are starting to pursue their dream! Or, more often than not, they are still working their day job and also pursuing their dream. And starting to actually make it happen.
And then the requests come in. Or rather, the sweet, “unassuming” expectations from loved ones come in. The expectation that they would get free coaching since they are friends. Or a discounted painting for their daughter’s birthday. Or tiramisu on the house when they come in to the new restaurant.
Your loved one is starting a new venture. They have likely put hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars into making this happen. They are most likely in debt now with their parents thinking they are insane for making this leap. Or, in this perilous year with soaring unemployment rates, maybe they lost their job of fifteen years and now they need a new gig. Unless they already have a fan base from a previously similar job (unlikely), their first customers are going to be their loved ones while they market, get the word out, and depend on reviews and word of mouth. In fact, they are counting on the people they know to help get them started. Do you owe them that? Not at all. But if you’re marching onto their new digs, don’t put them in that awkward position of feeling like they have to lower their product’s value and lose money to save face. They don’t owe you anything. And if you’re curious about what they have to offer, you owe them the respect of treating them like the new business owner that they are.
And you know what the best part is? When everyone treats each other with the value they are worth, everyone rises to the occasion and respects each other so much more. If it’s a personal training service, you bet your ass you’ll work ten times harder if you pay $75 per session versus $20. Your trainer will work harder too- creating you meal plans, texting you regularly, constantly improving your workouts. If it’s custom furniture, you will treat that piece with so much more care and use a coaster every time because it’s a $500 custom-cut-and-stained-piece by a friend vs. a table from Target. If it’s a new bed and breakfast, you will surely soak up every minute of that sparkling clean $200/per night room with those cute, blueberry cheesecakes in the breakfast bar vs. the free room from a friend. Like it or not, we place great value in the things we spend great money on. Of course, “great” does not mean hundreds or thousands of dollars. It means the value equal to the item purchased. Maybe it was a $10 homemade moisturizer from a friend. They could have easily tossed one your way, but wouldn’t you use every drop of that $10, five-ingredient moisturizer with pure lavender extract vs. that weird homemade crap your friend tossed your way? When we spend money, we’re more careful, more respectful, and dammit we wanna make sure we got our money’s worth. Your loved ones will appreciate and respect you so much more for it. And you will respect them so much more! Because we like people who know their value.
Stay mindful. Pay your friends what their products are worth. Don’t expect camaraderie to equate to free or discounted business. In the long run, it makes us all better.
